humour @ its best

few nice ones from the latest RD issue.....


What with the crowded quarters in economy class, I cant blame the airline passengers for asking flight attendants for free upgrades to first class. On a recent fully booked flight, a passenger stopped me with hat in hand, "is there any way I can get bumped up to first class?" he pleaded.

I shook my head, "not unless we hit turbulence". ------------------------Suzanne R


As a business writing instructor, I read a lots of resumes. Inevitably, I run across some students with skills no employer could pass up, such as:

• The young paramedic who "makes life-threatening decisions on a daily basis".
• A child care worker who can "overlook up to 35 children at one time".

• An enterprising young woman who is "flexible enough to perform in all manner of positions if the situation gets desperate". -----------Autumn C
  

When a car blew past a stop sign at a busy intersection, my uncle, a traffic policeman, gave chase and pulled the driver over.
"Didn't you see the stop sign back there?" my uncle asked ....yeah " I saw it," admitted the driver. The problem is, I didn't see you. ---------- Michael H


Sign seen in a church while leaving a seat to get to the altar "Please don't leave your personal things unattended lest someone assume that these are the answers to their prayers" --- Biebvenido G



The sheriffs race is on and the leading candidates name is ASKEW and his slogan is "A New Direction"

m.I.m

Acknowledgements:
I have read/taken the following content from

1) Readers Digest